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The Tragic Death of Fred Weasley

After watching the final Harry Potter film, philmophlegm speaks  "What was all the fuss about?  He's hardly Boromir!"

This is true.  Fred Weasley and Boromir have .... almost nothing in common. But now I am wondering about an alternative world where Boromir disappoints Denethor by refusing to go into the army, but instead sets up the first joke shop in Minas Tirith.

Comments

( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
smirnoffmule
26th Aug, 2012 21:25 (UTC)
It would be Faramir's fault, somehow.
osprey_archer
27th Aug, 2012 02:29 (UTC)
My first thought, too. No matter how Boromir argued he did it of his own free will, Denethor would always think Faramir made him do it.

And meanwhile Faramir would just be sad, because having to be the grand high commander of Gondor's army cuts into his reading time even more.
wellinghall
27th Aug, 2012 11:04 (UTC)
Does Faramir go around with his current scroll pasted to the inside of his shield, do you think?
osprey_archer
27th Aug, 2012 12:59 (UTC)
Ha! I hope so! But he might think that's a bad way to treat a scroll.
osprey_archer
27th Aug, 2012 02:30 (UTC)
My first thought, too. No matter how Boromir argued he did it of his own free will, Denethor would always think Faramir made him do it.

And meanwhile Faramir would just be sad, because having to be the grand high commander of Gondor's army cuts into his reading time even more.
bunn
27th Aug, 2012 09:59 (UTC)
Poor Faramir! I'm not sure he would even take Ron's delight in having an older brother with a joke shop! Faramir is so *serious*.
bunn
27th Aug, 2012 09:59 (UTC)
Denethor would definitely think so. :-D
skeptic7
27th Aug, 2012 02:07 (UTC)
I can't quite see Boromir being other than the perfect soldier, the perfect son, the heroic older brother and the expected heir to the Steward. Tolkein's Gondor seem to have that old fashioned aristocratic attitude where shopkeeping isn't quite respectable and a member of the snooty class should be a soldier, or doctor, or scholar.
Fred might not be a great hero, but he was Ron's brother and Harry had known him since the first trip on the Hogwart's express. Cedric might have been the first close death, but he was in a different house and older than Harry. Harry saw Fred almost every day for 4 or 5 years, and shared Xmases and birthdays and quidditch practice with him.
bunn
27th Aug, 2012 09:58 (UTC)
The movies short-change Fred and George a bit - I think they do end up as pretty minor characters if you haven't read the books (Pp hasn't). But they would be awfully long movies if they dealt with every thread in the books!

I'm sure that Gondorian culture would not be *at all* open to high ranking nobles going into trade - let alone opening a joke shop! I am amused by the idea of it as Boromir's secret ambition though. :-D
lindahoyland
27th Aug, 2012 04:34 (UTC)
That's a story I'd like to read LOL.

I find Fred Weasley's death especially tragic because he is a twin and leaves a severed half, so to speak.
bunn
27th Aug, 2012 10:00 (UTC)
Something makes me think that joke shops might be more of a Mordor thing than a Minas Tirith thing. You can just imagine orcs buying whoopee cushions and falling about laughing.
adaese
27th Aug, 2012 09:49 (UTC)
Aragorn was singularly unimpressed when, surrounded by marauding orcs, he discovered his trusty sword had been switched for a joke one with a broken tip.
bunn
27th Aug, 2012 10:01 (UTC)
*chortle*
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )

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